Seems like the way to go if you're dating these days.
Last night I spoke with yet another friend who is looking for love on the internet. Almost every single female friend I have is doing it. My hat is off to them.
Besides being daring enough to reach out to these total strangers, they have completed a task that overwhelms me --- creating a personal profile.
Maybe I'm over-thinking it, but by the time I got to the "Pay here" page of the profile I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I opted out.
As silly as it may sound, even describing my physical attributes caused me anguish --- is my body build slender, average, or curvy. Well, we all see things differently so to some I appear slender, I'd say I was average, but shopping for blue jeans these days would definitely put me in the curvy category.
What are my favorite movies, sports, hobbies? Since I'm and adventurer, the answer to most of those questions are "the next new one". However that answer is not an option, so I selected from the answers offered and hoped that my future someone special would view my preferences liberally.
Next comes the "Describe what you are looking for in a mate" question. Simple right? --- A caring, kind, compassionate, intelligent, funny, handsome, sexy, adventurous, worldly, romantic, sensitive, financially-secure, community-oriented, socially acceptable, great conversationalist, and exceptional lover that will love me, my family, my lifestyle, and my quirks unconditionally. I'm sure that's not all I'm looking for, but it's a start.
The entire process really made me think, deeply. It was mentally and emotionally exhausting because there was so much I didn't know. A few weeks ago someone asked me what my passion was and I was overwhelmed with that single question. Here I found question after question about personal preferences that I really hadn't ever considered voicing. Sadly I realized that probably no one in my life knew this much about me.
Even sadder was the fact that I didn't know with certainty many of these things about myself. Which, ironically may be the reason I and so many others are not in fulfilling relationships in the first place.
Of course I have to insert a disclaimer here before I have you convinced that I am a wishy-washy woman without a mind of my own. Maybe I'm struggle with this dating profile because I am so completely satisfied with my single life. I'm very content with living alone. I value the freedom of doing what I want, when, where and with whoever I want. I'm willing to give up this freedom only for something better. I think it's only fair that the man that chooses to give up his single freedoms to spend time with me know what he's getting.
So, do I have to have all the answers? Isn't that what dating is all about? Getting to know each other, getting to know yourself in relation to another? How I prefer to spend my time with someone will be different than how I spend it alone.
I will try to complete the profile again. But not until I study a little more.
"It is a sad fate for a man to die too well known to everybody else, and still unknown to himself."
----- Francis Bacon
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